Nebulous Prayers

And this morning God
All I can think about
is the passage

What forbids me from being baptized Philip?
asks the Ethiopian Eunuch
and I’m sure
Philip thinks
of all of the ramifications
that this person
is of nebulous rank
nebulous gender*
nebulous status
from another country

what authority does Philip have?
But Philip was sent by an angel
to say yes

And I feel like Philip
running alongside chariots
not knowing
what authority
we have

We are in a nebulous
time

knowing things are in flux
being asked hard questions

and I hope
we say
yes
as often
as we can

Because God knows
God is not preventing us
from loving
and including
each other

God’s yes
is strong
even when
we don’t know

And it’s ok
not to know

I don’t know God
that’s my prayer
I just don’t know
Amen

Feel Free to share/adapt/use with credit to Pastor Katy Stenta

*Though to be clear that individual, the Ethiopian Eunuch, may have known exactly who they were and what their gender status was, the LBTQIA breadth and depth is beautiful in all of it’s multiplicities 

Throw Jesus Off the Cliff

Some days
God
I feel like
we are throwing
Jesus
off a cliff


I feel like
we hear the words of prophecy
that say
Make things easier
help those in need

It is amongst the cacophony
of “Masculinity” “Capitalism”
and “Christian Nationalism”


Do you hear it under the cries for
Nazareth First?

Jesus says: I am here for the immigrant widow,
the strangers,
the broken,
the disabled,
the weird,
the LGBTQIA,
and the strange

I feel like
when we hear the echo
of Jesus’s voice
Calling us
to do the hard work
of the gospel

that when Jesus walks with us
and says
you are correct
Christianity
is not
about success

We have to sit down
and say
what is life about then

and many people
throw Christianity
leadership
Jesus
or whatever out

Why do we do this worship
thing
If it isn’t about that anyway?

Sometimes I want to put out posters
Come to church
We do brokenness
really well

Come to worship
We are bad at community

Join us Sunday
We have had to practice
for 2,000 years and are
still getting power dynamics
wrong

Put your faith not in
princes
power
and principalities

But the dandelion
still bloomed
A perfect
Weed
spreading
Wishies
for children
to blow
in the yard

I treasure God
calling me
a dandelion
full of
seeds
and
Wishes

Image: A child, in a red coat, you happily cannot tell their gender, drawing butterfly and heart) out of a giant dandelion (like making a wish). Image sourced from https://img.freepik.com/premium-photo/child-blowing-dandelion-with-heart-star-sketch_587981-17165.jpg


Practice focusing on God
practice community
practice honesty
exercise everyday–not
because you will win any races
But because walking together
is the journey

And some days
I too want to throw Jesus off the cliff
Because it’s clear
I still don’t get it

And then Jesus floats back
and hugs me
Because
it never was about
perfection
in the first place

But the moments of
beauty
community
laughter
still count

Thank God
for that

Amen

Feel free to use/share Adapt with Credit to Pastor Katy Stenta aka KatyandtheWord

When the World Continues to Burn

God,
the world continues to burn
and people continue to give
dare I say
hot takes
while people flee
breathe in smoke
or wait, bags packed, for the evacuation order

And we can feel the insurance structure
heavily burdened
crumble even more

And God,
for the rest of us
we feel climate change
breathing
on the back of our necks

As we still have to plan dinner
again
a solitary action in our
household units
in what used to be
a village action

The mundane things
of going to work
or school seem so trite
in comparison to what is going on in world
Is this how we respond to tragedy God?
Jesus Christ how do we go about our lives
in the midst of all of this?
(This is a serious question–as my teen would say)

And we look at the snow
in the South
the Fire in the West
the bare mountains
the mounting costs
of insurance

And yet, Divine one
You remind as the World Turns
That there is other news too
We see films of the heliocopters
making the exact water shots
to put out the fires
Of people waiting hours in line
to pay their respects
to Jimmy Carter–
Of all of the living Presidents
sitting together at the funeral
speaking of good seeds sown
that are recognized years later…


We see the pictures of
of the Mexican
and Canadian Firefighters
who come to help
and we hear the voices
of the undocumented Californians
who could not sleep safely
in their own homes
So instead
who journey to the fireline
to fight for their unknown neighbors

The Good News does not fix the Bad News
But it reminds us to be the Mr. Rogers Helpers
God may we be the Helpers
May we find substantive ways
To listen closely to the need for help

So that we me do just
love mercy
and walk humbly with God
i.e. not for show, but because
We have this ache to make the world
a place to dwell
that is are prayer today.
Amen

Feel free to use/share/adapt with credit to Pastor Katy Stenta “KatyandtheWord”

Here is a blog post from my colleague and friend “about where to donate ““We are still fine.

-Winds changed last night, and new evacuations were called in the Palisades fire. Bel Air Pres building is under mandatory evac as are many people’s homes. Teams are fighting their hardest to keep it from spreading any further.

-Air quality in Culver City is still not great. The winds have calmed down here, but there is still ash falling from the sky.

-We live across from the street from the fire station, and we’ve just heard siren after siren. God bless them, and all the reinforcements that have come from far and wide.

In the midst of everything, I put away our Christmas decorations last night. I couldn’t help but look at every ornament and think what it would be like to lose them all and have to start again.

Here’s a short blog I wrote last night. Please pray for these fires to end.”

Please give to Presbyterian Disaster Assistance – all funds go to help victims and will be shared with communities affected by the Eaton fire as well

https://pcusa.org/donate/dr000165-us-wildfires

https://almostnamedgrace.substack.com/p/when-everything-changes?r=25qkxh&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web&fbclid=IwY2xjawHvsMhleHRuA2FlbQIxMAABHSk1hcvm0mTlQmSeKcfXk-Q2t1LyMB4FtLVfxHrLHniA9jND2yBWnAFkaQ_aem_gS5ggy-a82_Z7OIo3OzG0A&triedRedirect=true

A Prayer for a World on Fire

Prayers for those evacuating
and for those for whom it feels impossible

Prayers for those whose homes, works and worship spaces are gone
and those who are caught in the space of not knowing

Prayers for those who has ash rain on them from the sky
Who think all the thoughts of thankfulness to Firefighters
worry for those working in the emergency services
Anger that we could not prevent this

Prayers for all of us
who sit in the midst of a world on fire
and think
This isn’t fine
actually
It isn’t fine at all

As we reach out
with communications
money
(hopefully not with unneeded clothing, etc. that clogs the system)
shelter
medical care
emergency items
and hope

So that we can put out
this fire
and prevent
the next one

Prayers for California
Prayers for all those
whose lives have been changed
May we all walk together
So that all the fires may be put out
Amen

Pic of Dog on Fire Meme using a fire hydrant to put it out—”It’s not fine, and you have a responsibility to act” (This meme would be more perfect if the dog had help, because I’m sure part of the point is that the dog felt alone in their work) Image found https://mastodon.sdf.org/@HunterZ/112714963002922245 and was credited to @spocko

"This is fine" dog spraying a fire extinguisher at a burning table, with caption "it's *not* fine, and you have a responsibility to act."

12 Days of Christmas: A Season

Christmas is 12 days
Because it is supposed to be an entire season
Enough time
to rest
refresh
reflect
It was never supposed to be all stuffed into one day
There was supposed to be
enough time
for journeys
getting lost
finding our way again
and then
eventually
room for
an epiphany

Christmas is
a space
a season

a journey
a wandering
a pondering

—-so if your haven’t done all of the Christmas things
Or if everything didn’t go perfectly

Remember you are in good
wizardly
some would even say
wise
company

Eyvind Earle 3 Magi (The artist for Disney’s Sleeping Beauty)

3 Crowned Men with black beards—identical, holding gifts frankincense, gold and myrrh, with black and Bluegreen cloaks trimmed in golden plants.

Offering the gifts to Mary with a baby (both with black hair) at her breast with a moon/golden plant trimmed halo around them. Mary is dressed in gold trimmed purple.

Solstice

On cozy nights
when the dark is long
I am reminded
that sleep is good
that cats know how to rest
and our bodies are more like gardens
then machines

As solstice comes
we celebrate

That seasons
change

We don’t have to be
stuck
there is beauty
in the creative
womb of darkness

In the peeping stars
the quiet snows
the gentler winters of the South

The Axis
on which the world turns
reminds us
that humanity celebrates
this
holy time
in so many beautiful ways

So Cozy Solstice
Blessed Rest
May you have spaces of Restoration
Sanctuaries of acceptance
And moments to just be

As we welcome in
the gentle rhythms
of what is yet to come

Feel free to share/adapt/use with credit to Pastor Katy “KatyandtheWord”

Longest Night/Blue Christmas

Blue Christmas, Longest Night, Lament, Hope, Comfort, Virtual,

This is a link to a Blue Christmas/Longest Night Service I wrote

It is written so it can be done at home virtually at your convenience
Though I love the community of church, I am also aware that sometimes that is not possible (as we missed one last night because my eldest’s volunteer work ran over)
So..if you are wishing to participate in a service of comfort
Feel free
Grab a candle if you wis (Completely optional)

Childhood, a Prayer

God there are so many
worries I have in
the world

But then I remember
that Ozma**
was restored
to rule
and got
her happy ending
and became a girl***
without any fuss at all

And that stories of
Defying Gravity
for
Different
Divergent
Witches
In not Pink Skins
are inspiring
Songs everywhere

and that Glinda too
realized
she needed a castle
with women

I remember that
Banksy is creating
and recreating
for Peace

I read all the
Science Fiction
and Fantasy
about acceptance

I remember
that people are
upset about
Woke
things
Because they
sell so well

And I take a deep breath
And sing
the Magnificat
Again

With Mary
As
We Advent
(Wait, Long, etc.)
again
for Jesus

*Footnote: Link above Mary Poppins Spoonful of sugar was inspired by the oral Polio vaccine which was given with a square of sugar to help the medicine go down. I am very worried about the discrediting of vaccines in this day of age. I am also worried because I have a child with autism, and although vaccines do not cause autism, time and time again people have insisted they basically would rather risk death then have a child with autism. It is a sobering thought.

**Footnote: Read Ozma of Oz, it is one of the first happy endings for LGBTQIA. Also L. Frank Baum wrote many, many women based upon his feminist mother-in-law, some of them funny, some of them strong, all of them amazing. There is a lot of variation in Oz, because it is fantasy. It is amazing, per usual. Wicked also has LGBTQIA acceptance obliquely within it, however L. Frank Baum’s stories are wide open for interpretation as most fantastic stories are.

***Footnote: “became a girl” is not quite right but it’s fantasy and this is poetry I don’t want to ruin for you…so excuse my clumsy wording for the gist of the mystery of the book that you will now have to read. 

No photo description available.

Joy

Joy
is not a platitude
though sometimes
we use it as a mask

Joy is not smile
Jesus loves you
it is not happiness

Have you seen
a joyful child?
the gift of their giggles
the wonder of life
borne from love
(yes I am writing
all bornes with
poetic “e”s this season)

Joy is rebellious
it is deep-rooted sense
of differentiated
Belonging
to Community
Creation
and Self
All at Once

it is the ability
to still Create
even in the Midst
of Grief

Joy is Art

Joy to the World
Is practicing
Advent
claiming the
Holy Imaginings
for better
How Much More
For Proclaiming Lament
And Claiming Tomorrow

Joy is the In-Breaking Christmas
In the Midst of Advent

Even the Ancient Priests had Proclaim in Pink
Excuse me I mean Rose
Because they could not hold back
the Gaudy Carols of Christmas
During the Long Season
Of Advent
(and not just because it used to be
Six Weeks instead of Four)

God, you know,
That we know,
We are tired of this Advent Season
Yet
Somehow
You Teach us Joy
In Children
In Art
In Gardens
In Our Deep Longings for More

Remind us that
Joy
is a
Revolution*
Amen
Amen

Feel free to use/adapt/share with credit to Pastor Katy Stenta “KatyandtheWord”

To read more about How Joy is a Revolution

https://aestheticsofjoy.com/joy-is-an-act-of-resistance-how-celebration-sustains-activism-2/

https://www.whatcompjc.org/blog/august-03rd-2020

“Incite Joy” By Gay Ross from your local bookstore