Lord God, I know that my ducks aren’t in a row,
because I don’t even know what my ducks are anymore.
How do I prioritize when everything is important? How do I do self care when my hours are chunked in weird ways and the schedule remains nebulous and to the wind.
Even when I breathe sighs of relief, or take moments of joy…I know that the ducks are waiting.
Sometimes they quack at me in the middle of the night, awakening me with all the things I’ve forgotten, or all the problems I’m not sure how to solve.
Lord knows, (that’s you God) that I don’t have my ducks in a row.
My work is never perfect no matter how much I try, my kids need more attention than ever (not to mention socialization) and I can’t seem to find a minute for myself.
Plus everything is different, still! Again! Always!
And ignoring the fact we can’t keep the house clean anymore isn’t really working either.
Are these even the duckies I should be worried about? What ducks am I missing? I’m sure I’m missing some, somewhere.
And I wonder if this is how Jesus felt, as he was chasing down that Wild Goose of the Holy Spirit.
Did he look around at the ducks and said, one of these is the goose, but I just can’t find the one I’m supposed to chase down and catch first.
But maybe, hopefully, the chase is enough. Hopefully between the chasing and the quacking, I have a moment to reflect on what I have completed, or what has gone right.
Or perhaps I will give myself one of those adulting prizes: for sleeping or eating or drinking water or moving around or taking medication. Those all count as important things done.
God, maybe my ducks have never been in a row–after all they are all your ducks and geese anyway. But help me to organize myself in such a way that I can let go of the ducks I can let go of and chase the right things to pursue the Holy Spirit of inspiration, comfort, energy and hope.
Maybe it isn’t about ducks at all, maybe it’s really about the Wild Goose of the Holy Spirit. Remind me to chase down the Wild Goose, and that this Wild Goose Chase is surely worth it.
God will help us to flourish, even at such a time that we don’t know where our ducks are.
Remind us of this we pray. Amen.
Feel free to use/adapt with credit to Pastor Katy
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