Tapped Out

I’m so tapped out of prayers.

I’ve been writing them for almost two years…

words have been ripped from my soul.

I’ve learned and yearned and earned

and still I find myself turning to God.

Anguished.

I think in my heart of hearts

that if I say the right words

everything will be fixed.

When instead, God….

you know.

You know God,

The right prayers do the opposite.

Cutting open the wounds,

Allowing myself to emotionally

throw up for the entire world to see…

and ironically

that helps

So here I am.

Stubbornly

Being Sick on the Page one more time.

Saying WHY GOD

WHY THE HELL WON’T WE DO THE THINGS WE NEED TO DO

to Bring a PANDEMIC to AN END.

Never in my life will I EVER use the expression

“Avoid it like the Plague”

Never will I take supply chains for granted.

And I look forward to being

a weird old lady

with tales of school from home,

when the church FINALLY got tech

after me a young-in pleaded for years with it,

Shutdowns, BLM, masks, baking

and that time when

we all learned to appreciate

science and vaccinations

(and hopefully redesigned how we

allocated ALL the national budget)

So here we are God,

just you

and me

and the world,

and a prayer

Trying to fix things.

I’m not going to stop.

Let’s go.

Amen.

Feel free to use/adapt/share with credit to Pastor Katy Stenta

Pandemic Prayers & Resources

Please consider supporting my 2nd year of Doctorate of Ministry in Creative Writing at https://gofund.me/aaeb4910

Author: katyandtheword

Pastor Katy has enjoyed ministry at New Covenant for 7 years, where the church has solidified its community focus. Prior to that she studied both Theology and Christian Formation at Princeton Theological Seminary. She also served as an Assistant Chaplain at Trenton Psychiatric Hospital and as the Christian Educational Coordinator at Bethany Presbyterian at Bloomfield, NJ. She enjoys working within and connecting to the community, is known to laugh a lot during service, and tells as many stories as possible. Pastor Katy loves reading Science Fiction and Fantasy, theater, arts and crafts, music, playing with children and sunshine, and continues to try to be as (w)holistically Christian as possible. "Publisher after publisher turned down A Wrinkle in Time," L'Engle wrote, "because it deals overtly with the problem of evil, and it was too difficult for children, and was it a children's or an adult's book, anyhow?" The next year it won the prestigious John Newbery Medal. Tolkien states in the foreword to The Lord of the Rings that he disliked allegories and that the story was not one.[66] Instead he preferred what he termed "applicability", the freedom of the reader to interpret the work in the light of his or her own life and times. "Hallows, not Horcruxes" Harry Potter

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