Don’t Give up, A Prayer

God

I am pretty mad at humans today

and Old White Men

and the powers that be

And the manipulators

Who thought one dollar more

was more important

than getting justice done

and the church

who put off

flipping tables

for another time and place

And I want to rage

and scream

and find the right punishment

for all of my enemies

except I don’t really know who my enemies are

just they they are out there

whispering nonsense about

pro-life and family first and great america

as they grind these things into dust

as they deal death

with additive drugs like “safety” “religion” and “whiteness”

And I feel like I’m going to throw up or pass out,

and my soul hurts with the magnitude of it all.

Is this when you run away into the desert? Jesus?

Or hop a boat into the ocean?

Or feed 5,000 people just for the hell of it?

Or invite yourself over to the tax collector’s house to dinner, just to piss everyone off?

Because at times like these I feel like if I don’t enact justice viscerally, I’m going to implode.

And then I have to remind myself I’m not Jesus, I cannot save the world.

So I beat my chest, scream a tree, write an angsty psalm, cry.

And maybe I retreat for one day instead of forty,

maybe I feed one person instead of 5,000

maybe I invite someone I’ve been meaning to over to dinner instead of a tax collector.

And I remind myself, it all counts.

Because all justice counts,

Because I’m not a Jesus or a superhero,

but at least I can do something,

and I’m not giving up.

Thanks for reminding us not to give up God.

Amen.

Feel free to adapt/use/share with credit to Pastor Katy Stenta

Author: katyandtheword

Pastor Katy has enjoyed ministry at New Covenant for 7 years, where the church has solidified its community focus. Prior to that she studied both Theology and Christian Formation at Princeton Theological Seminary. She also served as an Assistant Chaplain at Trenton Psychiatric Hospital and as the Christian Educational Coordinator at Bethany Presbyterian at Bloomfield, NJ. She enjoys working within and connecting to the community, is known to laugh a lot during service, and tells as many stories as possible. Pastor Katy loves reading Science Fiction and Fantasy, theater, arts and crafts, music, playing with children and sunshine, and continues to try to be as (w)holistically Christian as possible. "Publisher after publisher turned down A Wrinkle in Time," L'Engle wrote, "because it deals overtly with the problem of evil, and it was too difficult for children, and was it a children's or an adult's book, anyhow?" The next year it won the prestigious John Newbery Medal. Tolkien states in the foreword to The Lord of the Rings that he disliked allegories and that the story was not one.[66] Instead he preferred what he termed "applicability", the freedom of the reader to interpret the work in the light of his or her own life and times. "Hallows, not Horcruxes" Harry Potter

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