Crises of Faith

God, I’m in the midst of some kind of crises of faith.

As a person who always believe in happy endings, I’m not convinced it will all turn out alright in the end.

Because God, we are still being called into your story.

Like Jonah, who first refused the call. He didn’t want to go. He wasn’t going.

Ninevah wasn’t worth it.

Or maybe Jonah wasn’t worth it.

Either way, he didn’t wanna and God couldn’t make it.

So he hopped a boat to sail away–like the runaway bunny.

And then, the storms came, the dice were rolled and the fingers were pointed to Jonah.

God, Someone said whoever needs to go to Ninevah better get going…

but I know the truth, I know why it’s a crises, because the answer is us!

We are Jonah. And my crises of faith, is I don’t know if we can right ourelves.

God, I know you are speaking, whispering, yelling in our ears. God I don’t have faith that we have the ears to hear.

You say, help those who are in trouble: the lgbtquia people who are threatened, the black people who suffer state violence every single day, the women who are losing their jobs and their rights, the children and families who are still in f—ing cages!

And see, I know I’m like Jonah, because if/when people repent, can I practice grace?

I don’t have faith that I can.

So I’ll have to rely on yours Lord.

Holy Spirit, help me to breathe into this crises of faith, I pray.

Amen

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