Throughout all the many beautiful metaphors for the church
from bride
to Phyllis Tickle’s rummage sale
I thinking of the church
as a teenager
When I say the church, I mean of course the amorphous cloud of saints,
where it is hard to say who is in or who is out, but somehow contains the multitude of faith
trying,
practicing and
sometimes even succeeding to follow the ways of Jesus Christ.
Here is the Church, thinking it knows how to be mature, and all grown up. Thinking it knew what it meant to be together, thinking it understood everything–when
Boom, the place in society shifted,
Or society itself shifted
(probably both)
who the church was, what the church wanted to be, even who the church was hanging out with proved to be….. not really false, just not as authentic as the church wanted it to be.
It seemed….to not fit anymore
I mean did we really think that cozying up to institutionalism? buildings and nationalism was a good idea?
The answer is yes, yes of course, we thought fitting in was the answer.
It was so nice to have everyone flocking to our doors, Sabbath off, and people listen.
It’s always nice to feel heard.
Here we are all awkward again, and the church its body is doing weird, unspeakable things that we do not understand
I say this as the parent of a teen who
wanted a Halloween costume
Sat before Halloween (which is on Thurs)
then didn’t want to go trick-or-treating (as of Tues)
Then
Last Min
Realized that meant the costume was useless
Could I please help them assemble and dress in costume
And drive them to the Halloween event
That was going on at the high school RIGHT NOW on Weds
(never mind that dinner was just being served)
then they stayed for 15mins, and everyone saw them
And there was nothing else to do
So naturally
They called me
As I rolled in the driveway
To be picked back up
The church is a little uncertain
as to what is going to happen next
And what to wear
What to do
When everything was so certain before
We had five year plans
and programs
and even Building extensions
And now everything just seems hard!
What are our goals and purpose
And how are we even going to do them
If everything has to be different?
And our job is not to save the church
Not to take over, but let its find its way
To hold hand
like my three teenagers
and to say wow
Its so hard, when Two things are so true
Two Things (Both things)
That the angst is
real
understandable and scary
and change is really,
really hard
And no I’m not sure how everything is going to turn out in the end
that I trust that everything will turn out ok
because–because I believe in you, and you have good roots.
There are good teachings
models of behaviors out there
Because, mistakes and missteps are not all there is to life
Because just because you try some fad on
Like thinking Praise music, Projectors, or just getting enough young families is going to save us
Or putting our buildings on the covers of the bulletins
Or that only white men are the legitimate preachers (sometimes married sometimes single)
Or that we need to keep the four hundred and ninety seven million buildings to keep being the body of Christ–I mean heaven knows how many sparkles and chokers I wore in the nineties, and I still love my big earrings–
I truly love how spiritual conversations weave their way more naturally, more (w)holistically* throughout life these days.
God knows
just like any parent
There are probably more awkward phases
for us to go through
After all what’s a couple of thousand years
or So
In God’s Calendar Anyway?
We are just starting to Grow up!
Teenagers know what’s real
what’s authentic
Into the latest fad
because teenagers figuring out identity
it is developmentally appropriate for teens to be hungry to express themselves,
except when they are too depressed or angsty to do so.
The church is trying to find itself
It feels like we are the outcast at the party–
Christianity used to be cool, but it isn’t anymore
However, we, like most teenagers,
haven’t figured it all out yet
I will confess, I feel much more at home in the marginal church
than the up and coming popular one
However, I can understand what it feels like to ache to be wanted
to be at the center of things
to want to sparkle for a moment
I have teens who all want that moment in their lives
to know they are able to shine, but are struggling
The gift of church right now though
The people who are here,
Want to be here,
because we love it
We
Want to be here
We have no hanger ons
No fakers
Very few power seekers (though a couple of bullies sneak in)
There is not much money in the church**
People who are at church
Want to be here
We know that the Church sings to them
in some weird way
And we are angsty, because we want to express that
with everyone else.
It’s hard to be a teenager
Some of us haven’t been one for years
And wouldn’t go back if you paid us
However
a lot of us
are good at remembering
How to hold one another’s hands
And saying
Things will be ok
We don’t know what we are growing up to be
yet
What will take shape
Where it will go
What it will even look like
It may not even be our job
to make it happen
(is that scary or comforting?
Probably depends upon the day)
But it will be brilliant
We are quite sure
God will walk us
all the way there.
Resource List: (I feel like I should list nothing or everything here, so I just put 2 small resources to get started, maybe I’ll edit and add more)
Small Church Data: https://www.churchleadership.com/leading-ideas/6-ways-forward-for-very-small-congregations/
Gone for Good: Negotiating the Coming Wave of Church Property TransitionBy Mark Elsdon, Foreword by Willie James Jennings, https://www.cokesbury.com/9780802883247-Gone-for-Good
*I love holistic with a w, it imbues it with a meaning of natural, whole and in my mind it carries with it an inclusive meaning. Permitting us to include all those things that we find helpful science, nature, spiritual, emotional meanings instead of trying to separate them out.
**Again there are exceptions, but as a whole the church has fallen so much in power that most churches are small and there are few opportunities for big money or power in church.
Feel free to share/adapt with credit to Pastor Katy Stenta “KatyandtheWord”
Zits Comic by Scott and Borgman: Jeremy: Mom do you have a phone book? Mom (getting it from the drawer): Sure right over here. Pierce: NO WAY!” Mom: Aren’t you going to take it? Jeremy: Naw. It was just a bet. Pierce: Now ask her if she still uses a landline Comic found at: https://www.pinterest.com/pin/450219293983937704/
katyandtheword 